In a high-stakes election year, the PSD-PNL alliance loses another vote on election day.
An 86-year-old man from Argeș county, a rural region in Romania, didn’t get to see which candidates were being promoted in the polls.
He won’t see who makes it to the second round. And former President Traian Băsescu certainly won’t be crying tonight over the results, despite the perceived losses for his political allies like F-Lasconi (a prominent, often controversial, female politician), Russia’s influence, the FSN (a party with historical ties to the post-communist era), the PNL (National Liberal Party), or the AUR enthusiasts (referencing political extremists AUR party), because the old man simply dropped dead.
What went wrong on election day?
The PSD-PNL voter took his stamp, turned over the single-page ballot, and was gripped by horror. At first, he thought his eyes were failing him, but then he saw it: there were only four “thugs” (a common, disparaging term for unsavory political figures) on the ballot.
Two of them were openly flamboyant, and two were lurking in the shadows – all “cross-border agents” (implying foreign influence) sent by Putin to pound on Romania’s door like the legendary Prince Stephen the Great (a national hero who famously defended Romania from invaders), crying at his mother’s door that they wanted to return.
He only saw Călin Georgescu (a controversial pro-Russian nationalist candidate), not the popular TV personality Florin Călinescu, or Silviu Terheș (a Romanian politician elected as a Member of the European Parliament for Romania known for his conspiracy theories), or even the seemingly resurrected Diana Șoșoacă (a theatrical and polarizing nationalist politician), or George Simion (the leader of a far-right party, often depicted as a crude, opportunistic figure with “cheese under his armpit,” symbolizing corruption or low morals, “hunger in his soul,” meaning greed, and “theft in his eyes,” implying dishonesty).
The old man remembered how Gojira (a powerful youtuber on the political establishment or public opinion) had “dismantled” Călin Georgescu, the gloomy figure who wanted to build a “pipe of Russian influence” to let “murky water flow through it” (a metaphor for corruption and harmful foreign interference). He also smelled the “false culture,” grotesquely adorned with flowery language and quotes, of a “false intellectual and spiritual man” – a “popist” (a dismissive term for someone superficially religious or a populist demagogue who appeals to religious sentiment).
The same Georgescu, strutting around like a “Romanian dandy” (a self-important but ultimately unremarkable figure), was placed next to another fool, a pariah in neighboring countries – George Simion.
Simion had also promised “cheap houses,” a common unfulfilled political promise.
The Theater of European Politics
The old man also remembered the recently deceased Diana Șoșoacă, appearing with a “BDSM mask” (a reference to her often provocative and restrictive stances).
He recalled how she screamed for food in the European Parliament cafeteria after she had publicly condemned “poor crickets” and the flour made from them, protesting how Europe was supposedly forcing Romanians to consume them (a satirical jab at anti-EU and nationalist rhetoric).
It’s almost as if you can imagine parents scolding their young children:
Did you eat your cricket pudding, sweetie?
And he remembered Simion again, a “survivor of the phlegm of the galleries” (referring to the vulgarity and spitting often associated with radical sports fans, suggesting Simion thrives in such environments). He’s a man who exploits every opportunity, every disaster affecting people, to pose with a “trophy” – much like famous Romanian figures Ion Țiriac (a tennis legend and businessman), Ilie Năstase (a tennis icon), and even Nicolae Ceaușescu (the former communist dictator) would do after a successful hunt, showcasing their achievements.
Repulsion towards the PSD-PNL system
The widespread disgust with the “PSD-PNL alliance” system had pushed the electorate towards Georgescu.
We should all be disgusted. And when I say disgusted, I’m referring to the CCR (Constitutional Court of Romania), other “unicellular organisms” (a contemptuous term for insignificant or ineffective bodies), and other “organs” (a double meaning, referring to both state institutions and bodily organs) and politicians for allowing such “specimens” to run wild in the “zoo of Romanian politics!”
Before his final, terrible end, the old man thought it was pure bad luck to die with these four politicians (Georgescu, Simion, Terheș, Șoșoacă) on his mind. He would rather have died with the image of Monica Lewinsky, or at least Romanian public figures like Elena Udrea (a controversial former Romanian politician), Irina Login (a folk singer), Carmen Electra, Sofia Vicoveanca (a beloved Romanian folk singer), Cătălin Măruță (a popular Romanian TV presenter), Fuego (a famous Romanian singer), Lenuța Pârțag (a Romanian sitcom character), or even Elena Ceaușescu (Nicolae Ceaușescu’s wife) in his mind.
And may the people I made fun of for voting for Klaus Iohannis (the current President of Romania) five years ago forgive me for not being more critical of them!
So, the man from Argeș collapsed, his heart stopped, and he died in the worst possible place. This incident serves as a signal to all older “Georgists” (supporters of Călin Georgescu), “AURists” (supporters of the AUR party), and “Terheșists” (supporters of Cristian Terheș).
Thus, the Argeș man fell flat, his heart stopped pumping, and he fell dead in the worst possible place. This incident is a signal for all the older Georgists, Aurists, and Terchists. It may not be known what will happen in the short delegation to the shower cabin, as a statistical possibility that cannot be ignored.
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If you laughed, read also: Anti-Electoral Campaign Elena Lasconi: “We Are Champions in the Villages, at PNRR!”
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Romanian Member Escorted Out Of European Parliament For Heckling
